Hyphenated Citizens
As I’ve mentioned, my husband Takis and I were born in Europe, he in
This has meant having to interact with family long-distance; for
instance, here is a digital photo of me holding a card with birthday greetings
written on it – to be sent by email to my granddaughter. (I do not have an
iphone and so still operate in this old-fashioned manner. Also
ignore the date, as I haven’t managed to work out how to erase it!).
A Greeting to be emailed to a Granddaughter
See on webside of Neos Kosmos, Australia’s leading Greek newspaoper, www.neoskosmos.com.au
Historically, often due to war or crop failures, Greeks have left to look for a better life in other countries. I had previously considered the word ‘Diaspora’ was one that applied mainly to the Jewish race, but now I read that it is an old Greek word. In Greek it is mostly applied to those who have left the country and live overseas. In the ancient past the Diaspora set up Greek centres around the Mediterranean – nowadays the Diaspora live mostly to
In one article I read a writer objected to the idea of anyone being a
citizen of two countries, who he presumed would not be committed to either. He
is right this does happen to a degree. I think the deciding factor for the two
of us, as to which we will finally call ‘home’ will be the country where our
families reside. And meanwhile, if you can call it an advantage, living the
hyphenated life does make us more alert to disadvantages of each place and also
to its benefits.
The current economic situation inGreece
has meant that many Greeks are dissatisfied with their life in Greece ,
and so there has been a new wave of emigrants leaving. This,‘re-return’ of many
hyphenated Greek-Australians to Australia ,
has recently been highlighted on Australian TV.
From the Australian Broadcasting Commission interview by David Mark
DEMETRE KATSIKOPOULOS: It's strange. I'm still trying, you know to, trying to get used toAustralia
because two different countries.
The mystery is that this morning when Takis, assisted by Anestis with a broom, entered the bathroom (that has no holes and was soundly locked) there was no mouse. If ever there was the plot for ‘how the offender got out of the locked room’ this was it. We still have not solved the whodunit. However I think Takis now believes me, and tonight we set traps.
The current economic situation in
Quote:
From the Australian Broadcasting Commission interview by David Mark
DEMETRE KATSIKOPOULOS: It's strange. I'm still trying, you know to, trying to get used to
LOUKIA KONDOU: I don't know how to live in Australia yet, and I don't know how
we will live. But I feel that Demetre wants some time, I want to make this for him.
DEMETRE KATSIKOPOULOS: I'm waiting to see, you know, I'm curious how it is going to be my future here. I didn't come toAustralia to be rich, you know, I
just came to live with dignity.
Even in 2010 Nicole Itano wrote in Neos Kosmos of Greek-Australians who had leftAustralia to return to Greece only to find that the old
country didn’t feel like home anymore. Yet one cannot deny ones place of origin. Both of us, for instance,
count three countries in the list of countries that are to a degree ‘home’ to
us, (one where we were born, one where we have worked, and one where we now
live for much of each year). What it takes is an understanding that to a degree
we will always live in a ‘hyphenated state’ and that each country is important.
We wryly laugh at the choice we make when our countries are facing each
other in a sporting competition, or enjoy the competition when Takis and I are
opposing each other! Because cultural difference is something we’ve lived with for a long
time, this need for understanding is now a part of our marriage.DEMETRE KATSIKOPOULOS: I'm waiting to see, you know, I'm curious how it is going to be my future here. I didn't come to
Even in 2010 Nicole Itano wrote in Neos Kosmos of Greek-Australians who had left
It all began with a Watermelon
My husband is generally known as
Taki, a very common Greek nickname. However I perversely always call him Takis,
as ‘Taki’ sounded too much like ‘tacky’ to me. On his arrival in Australia
he’d wanted to assimilate quickly so he’d exchanged his Greek name, Panayiotis
Statiras, for a more Anglicised name, one that the locals would find easier to
pronounce. Hence to most people here in Australia he became known as Taki,
using his Greek nickname and, for a new surname, he ran his finger down the ‘S’
names in a telephone book and chose Stanton. When with trepidation he informed
his father in Greece
about his name change, his father wrote back saying the name he’d chosen was
very acceptable.
Though a naturalised Australian, Takis often revels in his Greek nature, and as a reserved English woman I was surprised when once he sobbed uncontrollably after watching the death scene during a film about Beethoven. And I had to get used to those times when he waved his arms and hurled abuse at another driver who was obstructing his path. However, life was always interesting, and I enjoyed the way my acquaintances broadened as I was introduced to Greek, Italian and Russian business partners and associates, and to Greek and Italian factory workers in his food factories.
I had expected that, as in most cross-cultural relationships, there might be a few communication problems between us, but I soon came to see that even a simple communication could cause problems. My first lesson came when he gave a wordless response to my question about whether he wanted a second helping of dessert. It wasn’t a vigorous headshake, rather an upward tilt of the head with raised eyebrows. At first I thought that this might be a Greek gesture of disdain, about the meal or perhaps an uncertainty as to his state of fullness. So had he not liked the sweet? Perhaps he needed to be encouraged to take another serve? Gradually I came to understand this culturally codified non-verbal ‘no’ response and I’d pack the dishes away.
Another frustration came whenever he jumped in with a solution before I had even had time to finish the sentence. For instance if I said, ‘Tomorrow, before the guests arrive, I’ll get...’ he would immediately jump in and tell me that he would get the food from the freezer, though I was about to say I’d bring in some extra chairs. We had a few arguments about this with me snapping, ‘Let me finish the sentence and then you’ll find out what I want to say!’ Finally I realised that his response stemmed from another cultural habit; that it was more natural for him to state an intention before filling in the when and where details, whereas I’d naturally do it the other way about.
There were, of course, problems for Takis too with my English way of expressing things. I came to realise that often I’d make typically ‘English’ – roundabout and sometimes ambiguous – statements. For me turning a statement into question opened up the possibility of negotiation, but for Takis this apparent uncertainty indicated a frustrating lack of clear purpose.
Though a naturalised Australian, Takis often revels in his Greek nature, and as a reserved English woman I was surprised when once he sobbed uncontrollably after watching the death scene during a film about Beethoven. And I had to get used to those times when he waved his arms and hurled abuse at another driver who was obstructing his path. However, life was always interesting, and I enjoyed the way my acquaintances broadened as I was introduced to Greek, Italian and Russian business partners and associates, and to Greek and Italian factory workers in his food factories.
Cross cultural confusions
I had expected that, as in most cross-cultural relationships, there might be a few communication problems between us, but I soon came to see that even a simple communication could cause problems. My first lesson came when he gave a wordless response to my question about whether he wanted a second helping of dessert. It wasn’t a vigorous headshake, rather an upward tilt of the head with raised eyebrows. At first I thought that this might be a Greek gesture of disdain, about the meal or perhaps an uncertainty as to his state of fullness. So had he not liked the sweet? Perhaps he needed to be encouraged to take another serve? Gradually I came to understand this culturally codified non-verbal ‘no’ response and I’d pack the dishes away.
Another frustration came whenever he jumped in with a solution before I had even had time to finish the sentence. For instance if I said, ‘Tomorrow, before the guests arrive, I’ll get...’ he would immediately jump in and tell me that he would get the food from the freezer, though I was about to say I’d bring in some extra chairs. We had a few arguments about this with me snapping, ‘Let me finish the sentence and then you’ll find out what I want to say!’ Finally I realised that his response stemmed from another cultural habit; that it was more natural for him to state an intention before filling in the when and where details, whereas I’d naturally do it the other way about.
There were, of course, problems for Takis too with my English way of expressing things. I came to realise that often I’d make typically ‘English’ – roundabout and sometimes ambiguous – statements. For me turning a statement into question opened up the possibility of negotiation, but for Takis this apparent uncertainty indicated a frustrating lack of clear purpose.
So, before setting out on Our Big Greek
Adventure we had already experienced the cross cultural confusions, not
only in front of a sports-cast on the TV.
It was a situation that we anticipated would continue exist for us in Greece .
England , a longing to returning
there was not such an issue for me once I was married and had children and
grandchildren. Though I will admit I did hold onto some of my childhood dreams,
one of which revolved around the image of a large old house somewhere in
England, or perhaps France. I had this picture in my mind of me as a
housekeeper carrying a large bunch of keys at my waist (perhaps after reading
Jane Eyre).
It was when we finally both retired from full time work and at the
same time the opportunity arose to renovate an old family house in a Greek
village it seemed that we might be able to fulfil a joint dream – that of
acquiring a large old house and live
in Greece. It was this opportunity that initiated... Our Great Greek AdventureDreams ........of a Big Old House
While I had been homesick for
Currently it is October, and autumn in the northern hemisphere. It
is the time of ‘mists and mellow fruitfulness’.
Today we had baked pumpkin for lunch, two small ones from the garden,
and we talked about the huge orange ones we’d seen for sale in some of the
island grocery shops. They were large enough to carve pumpkin faces, as they do
in the States.
It is however also the time for the mice to make their first forays
into old houses, and the other day I was sitting at the computer when I heard
one dancing across the ceiling. The scampering noises were heard, by me, the
next day too. Takis however refused to believe me as he was sure that he had
all holes covered. But last night confirmed it. I went to the bathroom, for
midnight relief, and with the light on and the door closed my suspicions were
confirmed. I suddenly found I was not alone a mouse was running circles around
the room. I yelled, but with no answering forthcoming from the bedroom. So I
rushed out and slammed the door. The mouse was locked inside.The mystery is that this morning when Takis, assisted by Anestis with a broom, entered the bathroom (that has no holes and was soundly locked) there was no mouse. If ever there was the plot for ‘how the offender got out of the locked room’ this was it. We still have not solved the whodunit. However I think Takis now believes me, and tonight we set traps.
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