Greek Cousins

 The Greek Cousins

I must apologise that its taken a while to get this blog up and running. The problem was that when we got back to Australia we found our computers only working intermittently. This could have been caused by the very strong winds Melbourne had this past winter (and which we missed as we were in Greece!) Also, once again, my pictures did not want to stay where I placed them and floated all over the page. HOWEVER, with one or two calls to Telstra, and help from a daughter, I've managed to put together more of our story, the part in which the drama of buying the house begins.

(The very start of our adventure, when the idea first popped into my husband's head can be located on my first blog (since writing these blogs I’ve discovered that blogs do not adapt very well to a chronological tale, and to find that part of the story you'll have to scroll right down to the bottom of the page, or pick up the one called 'Dreaming of a Homeland')

So, to quickly recap, my husband Takis decided to buy and renovate his grandfather’s old house on the island of Lemnos.....

The house was probably originally a two story stone house, and belonged to Takis great grandfather, Johannes Pandezolou. We have now renovated the house, and we have pictures of the great grandparents, the grandparents, and the original nine children, hanging in our living room.

                    Reflected in a mirror pictures of the Pandazolou and Mavrellis family.

The history of this family begins with Johannes, who had left the island and found work in Egypt in the mid 19C and when his daughter married George Mavrellis he made over the house over to her as a dowry gift. Ephterpi and George (who also came from Lemnos) continued to live in Egypt but every year they sailed to Lemnos for their summer holidays, along with their nine children!

Those nine children married and their children continued to spend their summers in the old house. When we came along and decided to buy the house there were about 36 progeny that were in possession. We did eventually manage to buy the house from all of these cousins but it took time – about six years!

It all began with a watermelon

Takis’ phone calls to the cousins became a nightly event, and he began to get even more enthusiastic, if that was possible. Most of the cousins lived in Greece but there were also a few cousins in Canada. These were particularly surprised to hear from him after all these years. And when they learnt that they still owned a part of a house in Greece they were even more surprised – even some of the Greek cousins had been a bit taken aback with this news.                                                        Because Takis hadn’t spoken to most in years, he couldn’t immediately, or too bluntly, plunge into the topic of buying up shares, so he tended to begin casually.

‘Georgos, Taki here, Taki Statiras!’

There would be a gasp of surprise and then, ‘Can it really be you?’

This would lead the two to share information about their recent lives. A little later Takis would begin telling them about his visit to Lemnos earlier in the year, and when reminded of the island house all recalled stories they’d heard from their parents about the place. Then would come memories of their own family holidays there in the 50s and 60s. In response Takis would give a description of the current condition of the property, and begin to outline his plans. On hearing this, his listeners became cautious, saying that though they loved the island they really didn’t want be involved in any renovation projects.

So, while most commended him for trying the save the family house, and many said that they would genuinely support him, they all began to hedge. Even the few who sounded slightly interested were not attracted enough to make any commitment. And when he said that his interest extended to buying their shares, they all expressed extreme hesitation about selling. The reason was, of course, that they were the grandchildren of a Greek trader, and what sort of Greek trader would willingly pass up an opportunity to make a deal? Thus, though doing so tentatively, each did put out feelers to discover how much they might get if they did sell.

At this point I should explain a little more about the complicated, and very Greek, legal land title that the house stood on. Grandfather George had left the house exathieretou (undivided) to his nine children. This meant that each had equal rights to the house, the land, and all that was therein and thereon. This right was passed on to their children, and so on down the line.

When Takis had first explained this to me I was horrified. ‘But this is impossible. There’s no one person to approach! There will be dozens by now who consider themselves owners. How will you find them all?’

Then another thought struck me. ‘If they all think of themselves as owners, will all have a right to come whenever they want?’

‘That’s how it has always been, and why the house was filled with folk when I went in the 70s.’

Suddenly the main reason for the present rundown state of the house hit me. ‘So no one takes the final responsibility for maintenance, because there’s no incentive for anyone to do anything when it belongs to so many!’

The house when we began work on the roof and bathroom addition

However, as a result of his continued resolve Takis did begin to make some progress towards his goal, and a few cousins began to come around to his way of thinking. The first to agree to sell were the Canadians, as they realized they couldn’t easily visit the house in Greece again. As to the others, Takis said it was clear that most of the Greeks would only agree to his point of view in face-to-face discussions. With every confidence he assured me that in the end it would come down to each person’s immediate self-interest.

‘Some will need the money right away and they’ll jump at any offer. Some others are very involved with their own lives and won’t care what happens. Then there are others who might want to keep possibilities open, thinking that they might go to the house later. What’s sure is that none of them want to spend anything on upkeep.’ He then added confidently, ‘That gives us an advantage. You’ll see, in the end most will sell.’

     A bust of the original George in our garden

Remembering the scene in the film My Big Fat Greek Wedding when the boyfriend was introduced to the heroine’s Greek cousins and nephews, all named after their grandfather, I soon found that in this family many had been named after their grandfather, George. The hero in that film had to deal with many variations of Nicholas (Nick, Rick, Nicco and so on), but unfortunately there aren’t many nicknames for the name George. After a while of referring to them with their full name, Takis and I devised nicknames to help me know what was going on. It meant no disrespect but summed up the place of each in the present scheme of things. There was of course George the Brother, but then we added George the Beaver (the dogged one that kept pushing for his rights no matter what), and George the Weasel (the one whom everyone was trying to collect money from) and so on.

This was especially helpful as events very quickly hotted up and the deal to buy up the shares became even more convoluted. In our particular saga it seems that the Weasel owed the Beaver money, and if we arranged to buy the Weasel’s share the Beaver then knew that the Weasel had enough money to pay back the longstanding debt. However, it then struck Takis that as the Weasel also owed money to the Brother, ‘Why not make the same deal for him?’

Meanwhile everyone was telling us not to trust anyone else, and to keep the details of these deals secret. As a result, while conducting any one transaction Takis tried not to let the right hand know what the left was doing. However, to our amusement and chagrin, we found they were all phoning each other anyway.

But in the end it was not the Canadians or this particular deal between the Georges that became Takis first investment in the house. On a visit to Athens Takis’ sister told him that one of his other cousins had fallen on hard times and that his wife needed cataract operations on both eyes. She suggested it would help them if he bought that cousin’s share, and on going ahead with this transaction Takis found himself possessing not only his own share (a 36th) but also this other small share (an 18th). It was a start, and marked the beginning of our financial commitment. And on hearing of this transaction the other cousins once again began phoning. The Beaver, the Brother and the Weasel were reinvigorated and restarted negotiations.

To me it still sounded a very circuitous way of paying debts and acquiring shares. But as Takis explained to me yet again how it was that cousin George owed cousin George money, and if cousin George could benefit from cousin George’s selling of his shares, why should not brother George also benefit? Confused? I certainly was. It reminded me of a jingle my old London granny used to recite about two brothers, both called Bob, My brother Bob owes your brother Bob a bob, and if your brother Bob doesn’t pay my brother Bob the bob he owes, my brother Bob will bob your brother Bob a bob in the eye!

More Books:

About this time I became particularly interested in books by other women who had followed their Greek husbands back to Greece.

Sofka Zinovieff, Eurydice Street, a place in Athens (Granta Publications, 2004). The writer marries a Greek. This book details the first year of her life after the couple with their two daughters move back to live in Athens.   She writes knowingly about the rites and rituals that Greek families all observe, and quite lot about what it means to live in Athens.

Gillian Bouras, A Foreign Wife (Penguin Books Australia Ltd.,1990). This well-known Australian writer tells of her difficulties accepted as a new wife in a Greek family and  in a small village community. She has also written A Stranger Here (Penguin Books Australia, 1996). This book is a novel that looks at the lives of three women and studies their feelings of displacement living in Australia and Greece.